I have been writing and re-writing this letter for the what seems like forever. I know I have to get these words from my head, but I also want to keep them locked up tight forever because this letter feels like defeat. I can refuse to give up my hopes and dreams of you, my flesh and blood, but I know if I don’t stop now I will end up being a shell of who I am.
Baby, know that I have dreamed of you a billion times. I imagine Seeing you for the first time and having my heart stolen. Knowing that In a beat I would lay down my life for you. I have imagined showing you off, and squeezing you. I imagine being exhausted and waking in the night to comfort you. I imagine being so, so proud of you, To see you conquer the world and knowing that from your very first step, you will succeed.
I know the weight of you, I know how you smell and I have heard the sound of your laugh.
I Have wished and I have prayed, I have Begged and I have Bargained just to meet you.
Baby, Know that you are wanted. You have been Loved. You would never feel alone, I am yours.
Daddy would teach you to be strong, Mummy would tell you everything will be ok.
I would give anything & everything to make you happy.
I imagine you growing up and Know in my heart what a great human you will be. A good mum always knows.
Baby, Always remember one thing…
Mummy loves you.