It’s a been a bad week. 

I’m learning to love the life I have and stop comparing what others have against what I can’t have… I’m enjoying trying ways to ‘Make It Matter’

But   *excuse me while I lay on the floor flailing my arms and legs while having a full blown temper tantrum* I want one!! 

It’s been one of those weeks where babies are everywhere! Obviously I love babies but, seriously, could they not spread them out in manageable doses?? Why, when I am making such a bloody effort must you parade babies and pregnancy announcement around.

So to kick my week off – one friend, one colleague and my own fricking nephew announced pregnancies. My nephew and his girlfriend 18 years old – come on! I’ve been asked to attend yet another baby shower, was visited by my cousin who we already knew was pregnant but as a cheeky gut punch confirmed Twins and just to top it off attended a christening on Sunday with the whole family and about 27 kids running around.


In reality Non of this was bad it was incredibly pleasant and of course I’m so happy for each of them…

I just look to the heavens and think what about me?

I feel like I’m shrinking, forgotten about. I’m trying everything I can to move on yet still stuck right here, the same place I was 10 years ago. 



  1. Reading this post gives me the oh so familiar feeling in my gut. Feeling sad, yet ok and a thousand of butterflies in my stomach that I can’t recognize what the emotion is. Sending you a big hug and wishing on the stars that your time will come soon. Much-much sooner than the 13 years that it took us! it will come.

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